Archive for the ‘Tips and Tricks’ Category

Hi friends, in this video I tell you how cheating on a test altered the course of my life forever.  It’s helped me understand why learning to use the law of attraction was so hard for me, and why it’s so hard for so many other people, too.

When all else fails, it’s time to go back to school. Click on this banner to begin your journey in the School of Life Mastery:

My family spent last week pulling a trailer to various places between Mesa, Arizona and Salt Lake City, Utah for spring break.  Oh, I could write volumes on the shenanigans we experienced, but for the sake of this post, I’ll try to keep it to one point.

We had just spent an entire day trying to get from Mesa, AZ to Goblin Valley, Utah, not really comprehending how unrealistic such a jaunt in one day really was.  After missing our turnoff in Flagstaff (add 3 hours to the trip because of the unscheduled stop at the meteor crater on the way to Albuquerque), our hope was to reach Goblin Valley, Utah before the RV park closed at 10 pm.

On the map, there’s a nice little road from Mexican Hat, straight up to Hanksville, which is only a little ways away from Goblin Valley.  By the time we reached Mexican Hat, it was clearly impossible to hope for a 10 pm arrival; we’d be lucky to get there before midnight.  I just prayed that the gate would remain open for us by some fluke, so we pressed on.  We had already paid for the first night, and I wanted to benefit from it.

(Do all you CAN do, and expect things to work out for your in the end, right?)

When we reached the turnoff outside of Mexican Hat, there was a large, obnoxious sign that said we’d be stupid to drive that road with an RV.  It was small with switchbacks and although I was anxious to get to Hanksville, we decided it would be smartest to go an extra 40 miles out of our way through Bluff and Blanding instead.

By 1:00 in the morning, we finally rolled into Hanksville, exhausted and grateful that we were there in one piece.  It had been a lonely, dark, unpredictable and nerve-wracking road with our long and heavy trailer.

We slept at a gas station in Hanksville, and in the morning, headed down highway 24 towards Goblin Valley.  Happy to be close to our destination and well rested, we excitedly told the kids we were almost there. (To this point, the destination was still a secret.)

About 20 miles out of town, my son saw something sparkly spread across the hills on our left.  I looked, and was amazed at its beauty – it looked like it was covered in hundreds of yards of gold.  I knew it couldn’t possibly be, so I just assumed it had to be pyrite (fools gold).

Unexpectedly, the glitter ended with the next hill.  “Shoot!” We thought, “we should have stopped to see what it was and take some home with us!”  But our trailer was too large, and we were too long to turn around on the narrow 2-lane road, so we just pressed on.

Around the next corner, my husband Trevan thought he saw some on the right side of the road and quickly pulled off to take the opportunity.  But it only took a moment to realize that the solid-looking shoulder was deep and soft from rain the day before.  He gunned it to get back on the road, but it was too late.  We were stuck.  Stuck on a road that sees a traveler only once in a very long while.

Long story short, a group of college kids eventually saw us, turned around, and stopped to help in vain (to my oldest son’s amusement, one happened to be from the same high school as he attends now, 550 miles away).  Then a man in a truck stopped, and went into town to get a chain.

With everyone pushing, and the man with the truck pulling, we finally pulled out.  My husband ran ahead to thank the man in the truck, who asked us where we were going.  He responded, “Goblin Valley!”  To which the man replied, “You’re going in the wrong direction!  You need to take the 24 East, not West.”

Amazing. We were already 30 miles off course and would not have known it for a very long time had we not gotten stuck in the mud.

The college students asked, “Why did you pull off the road?”

We chuckled, “Because we saw something sparkly.”

They laughed at us, hard.

You know, sometimes life is like this.  You’re traveling along in the wrong direction and don’t even know it.  So God allows you to be enticed by a dream that gets your attention – maybe it’s financial freedom, maybe it’s a nice house or a car.  So you divert your attention toward the goal and somewhere along the way, you end up getting stuck.

In an effort to get unstuck, you reach out for help, and ultimately learn something that puts you on course toward your ultimate goal, after having been off course without even knowing it.

People looking for more money or a better lifestyle often end up discovering the principles of prosperity and laws of success which apply to all areas of their life, all because they got stuck financially and searched for a way out.

The good news is, being stuck is one of the best things that can happen to you, because it often stops you from continuing in the wrong direction, and opens up an opportunity for you to not only get unstuck, but to get back on course when you didn’t even know you were going the wrong way in the first place.

I’m convinced that’s what the “glitter” of life is really for.  “Materialism” – being too consumed with material things – isn’t all bad, because it gets your attention, and if your heart is in the right place, it can lead you to answers you don’t even know you need.

For more help on getting unstuck, prospering your family, and turning your life around, visit http://www.prosperyourfamily.com.

My friend Natalie taught a lesson during our women’s meeting at church recently on “Having Temperance in All Things”.

Temperance = moderation and self-restraint

I easily understand this in terms of harmful substances and addictive behaviors, but when I think about what “Temperance in All Things” means, I have trouble.

I haven’t been good at knowing how to be temperate in goal achievement, for example.  I aim high, and then I overbook myself and get overwhelmed by all that needs to be accomplished.

I haven’t known at what point I can say, “I’ve done enough.”

In fact, just that morning I was praying for some insight on how to keep up better with all that I juggle.

Part of my problem is that I’ve had the mindset that I can do anything – and so there’s no such thing as doing “too much”.  I don’t always know how to temper my over-ambitious tendencies, because frankly, they’ve helped me achieve some things that I’m pretty happy about.

However, sometimes my mortal body can’t keep up with the pace of my thoughts and ambitions… and so predictably, I go through periods of unbridled ambition, followed by periods of crashing and burning, until I regain my strength and start it all over again.

I’m telling you, that kind of pattern can eventually break you, like bending a metal rod back and forth over and over again.

That morning before church, however, I could feel that I was on the verge of another crash-and-burn, and so I prayed to receive insight on the matter that day.  I knew something wasn’t quite right about my methodology… but I just couldn’t seem to see how to be any other way.

Then Natalie, at the front of the room, began.  I’ll try to sum up the experience.  She said:

I like to make cookies.  In fact, I have a wonderful recipe for Chocolate Chip Cookies that just works. Over the years I’ve used it, as long as I follow the right steps, we will predictably end up with perfectly delicious cookies.

If I set the timer for 13 minutes and take them out on time, they’re perfect.  But if I get busy and ignore the timer, pretty soon I’ll smell them, and I’ll run to the oven to take them out, but it will be too late.  They will be hard, dark, and good for nothing but to be thrown away.

There are four important steps for making a perfect cookie:

First, you mix the sugar, eggs and vanilla together.

Second, you add the flour and baking soda.

Third, you add the chocolate chips.

Fourth, you shape and bake them.

If I follow all but the last steps, I don’t have cookies, I only have goupy dough.  Can you imagine how your friend would feel if you brought her a covered, decorative plate with a carefully positioned pile of cookie dough lumps?

Baking the cookies has to be one of the most important parts – otherwise you just don’t have a cookie.  Baking them right determines if they will be quality or not.

The timer is important to help you make sure the cookies don’t burn.

There is a verse in the Doctrine and Covenants that speaks of doing God’s work.  It says, “And no one can assist in this work except he shall be humble and full of love, having faith, hope, and charity, being temperate in all things, whatsoever shall be entrusted to his care.”

We have been given a recipe for life in this verse.  I’d like to compare it to the recipe for cookies:

First, the sweet stuff (sugar): being humble and full of love.

Second, the substance (flour): having faith and hope.

Third, the little things that make all the difference (chocolate chips): doing charitable service.

Fourth, the process that transforms the mixture (baking): action, energy, and attention to your responsibilities – with all the ingredients listed above.

Finally, stopping the process when the timer dings: listening to that inner voice that quietly says, “It’s enough.”

She continued, but the lesson just to that point had a profound and lasting effect on me.  I felt that the lesson had been prepared with ME in mind – and it touched my heart that the Lord could and would answer me so directly. For the first time in my life I could finally understand that yes, there is such a thing as too much, and if you push the limits, you run the risk of ruining everything.  Too much of even the most wonderful things can turn into something bad.

Finding that middle place, trusting that it is by “small and simple things” that “great things are brought to pass” is an act of faith of the highest order.

I began to listen more carefully to the Spirit of God that serves as my “timer” – it quietly alerts me when I’m pushing things to long or too far, and when I think I may be hearing it, instead of rationalizing that “I can still do MORE!”, I think about burnt cookies, and it has helped me stop soon enough to avoid burning out.

Natalie concluded by giving us each a perfectly formed cookie and said:

Baking is what determines the quality of my cookie, and temperance determines the quality of my life.

Thank you, Natalie, for being an instrument in God’s hands that day – my prayer was answered in a significant way (and my family thanks you for it, too!) 

Are you a Mom who helps with the family finances? Do you feel guilty for not being 100% attentive to your children?

That’s how I felt for many, many years.

What I didn’t realize, was that I was doing damage in a way I had never considered, simply by the way I thought about my situation.

All the time that I felt frustrated and angry about having to work, I wanted my children to grow up believing that our situation was NOT the standard.  I wanted them to believe that mothers should be 100% attentive to their children.  I wanted them to grow up expecting things to be more “ideal” in their future families.

I’d say things like, “I’m so sorry I have to work so much!  I really should be spending time with you, and I promise, we’re doing all we can to fix the problem!”

Or, “I wish I didn’t have to work!  I hate the way things are, but we’ve just got to keep hoping that things will get better.  We have to be patient; can you hang on just a little longer until things can be better?  I really believe this won’t last forever…”

My intentions were good, but what I was really communicating was doing more damage than I realized.

1) I was teaching my kids that my husband and I were doing something wrong, when in reality, we were doing precisely what was necessary.

2) I was teaching my kids that it was acceptable to complain about doing what was necessary. I realized my error when I noticed them complaining about their necessary work, and expecting things to be easier for them, too. For example, they complained about having to walk to school because I was too busy to drive them a measly 1/2 mile in beautiful Arizona weather.  They complained about having to cook, clean and do dishes because I was too busy to do my “regular motherly duties”.

3) It became easy for my kids to conclude that Mom and Dad just don’t keep their promises when the need for me to work stretched from months into years.  I believe our children had a harder time believing the things we said because of it.

4) The “guilty Mom” syndrome caused me to overcompensate in other areas. If they begged for more privileges (even privileges that contradicted family policy or went against plain good sense), I was more likely to give in, just because I felt guilty about working too much. (My friend Matt Reichmann who works for LAPD and sees plenty of domestic dysfunction says there’s nothing more dangerous than a guilty parent.)

One of the best shifts I’ve ever made in my life was the day I decided to stop apologizing for working.

Yes, I still thought it would have been more ideal for our family if I had been able to give more time to my children, but under the circumstances, the next best thing I could do for them was to change the way I felt about it:

I decided to accept my situation and make the most of it.  Instead of saying, “I’m so sorry for working so much; I wish I didn’t have to…”  I started saying things like, “Hey, this is what needs to be done, and you know, it feels really good to work!” Or, “Hey, let’s both get some work done, and at 4:30, let’s go to the park!  What would YOU like to accomplish?”

The energy in our home shifted in an incredible way.  We also decided to make our children more involved in our work, and help them see the impact that it had in the lives of others.

We showed them how doing their chores and helping the family run more smoothly (picking up the slack where Mom couldn’t do it all), was actually helping people all over the world have better lives.  We helped them see the bigger picture, and they started doing family chores more cheerfully.  They even started doing what needed to be done without being asked.

My children are incredibly independent.  They became that way because they had to be.  But I have no regrets – they are learning how to work, and how to feel good about a job well done.

This family is certainly not perfect, and my kids still complain just like anyone else’s kids, but every one of my children has had at least one wonderful moment when they made that shift, and expressed great satisfaction from being independently productive.  It only takes a few of those successes for a child to have a memorable comparison between how they feel when they’re cheerfully productive and how they feel when they are not.

I’d say it’s the law of Polarity in action: what I thought was so horrible (me working) has turned into a tremendous blessing in our family – but only because I first decided to stop apologizing.

No matter what your work is, it’s helping someone.  Talk to your children about what you do, and the difference it makes in the lives of others.  Teach them by your example to learn how to enjoy being productive.  This is one of the greatest gifts you can give them before they leave the home: a love of work, and an acceptance of what “is”.

(Accepting what “is”, is the first step toward major transformation.  Test it!)

Do you see how children learn from our examples, whether we work or we don’t?  Teach them to find joy in making a contribution when necessary.  Teach them by your example to accept the things they cannot change, and find happiness, no matter what.

If you don’t have to work, I hope you’ll still find work to do – a hobby, a project, community service, whatever – so that your children can learn these lessons.  It’s worth it!

See, no matter how well you parent them, they will face challenges in their adult life.  How well they turn out will have less to do with whether you worked or you didn’t, but more with how they saw you to respond to your challenges.

For more on this topic, read Portal to Genius.

As described in The Jackrabbit Factor and more completely (and extensively) in Portal to Genius, we all have access to that little voice in our heart that nudges us in the right direction to to do exactly what needs to be done, and become all we were meant to become.

Some people call it a gut instinct thing, some people call it an inner voice, some call it the Holy Spirit, or Spirit of God.  Whatever you want to call it, it’s there for you, as you strive to live correct principles, and if you listen carefully, patiently, and especially if you’re willing to follow it when it comes.

The more you listen and follow, the more it will show up for you. It can take some practice recognizing it and trusting it, but it’s worth the effort.

If you’re experiencing information overload, it will be difficult to identify the right things to do, because all the “noise” will crowd out your own best adviser: that inner voice.

Need help sifting through all the information you don’t have time for, but which feels too important to put aside? Read my previous post called: Too Much Information?

One leader named Richard G. Scott has taught that those quiet thoughts often come when you are the most still, the most peaceful; so it’s important to keep a notepad and a pen next to your bed – because when the ideas come, they come quickly, quietly, and are just as quickly forgotten if you don’t write them down.

Here’s the story of the missionaries who followed his advice and received a strong impression to prepare, about 2-3 weeks before they experienced the 8.8 earthquake in Chile on February 27, 2010:

CLICK HERE to read about the missionaries in the Earthquake

If you’ve ever had an experience where you were glad payed attention to your “gut instinct,” share it below – we’d love to hear about it!

A few years ago I hired a marketing coach to help me with my websites. At the time, my sites were generating somewhere around a whopping $29/month. Not nearly enough to even cover the expenses of running an online business.

At the time, we were generating sales offline through our events and book sales, but I really wanted to take my message online and reach more people quicker, and more automatically. I knew the information I had to share would help families all across the world create better lives for themselves and their children, so it was time to hire a coach who could help me do that.

Now, I know that there’s a lot of good information out there that would have helped me accomplish my goal, but I needed someone who could walk me step-by-step through whatever I needed to learn and implement, and I found Charlie Cook.

I hired him to coach me for three months, so we talked on the phone once a week and I spent every spare moment I had implementing his recommendations.

After implementing just a fraction of what he suggested, our sites began generating a predictable $4000/month.

Think about this: I spent a few thousand dollars to hire him.  Was it worth it?  Do you see how an investment in your mental capital can yield tremendous dividends?

I hadn’t talked to him in a few years, so I recently sent him a message of gratitude, to give him an update on what’s happened with our businesses since then. He responded with a gift that he’s letting me share with you, because he knows I’m in the business of teaching you how to be successful in whatever it is you’re wanting to do, too.

So if you have a business, or if you’re thinking about starting one, be sure to download his FREE ebook that will teach you the marketing secrets you need to know in this new economy.

Click HERE to get Charlie’s Gift

Enjoy!

Warmest regards,

Leslie

We recently noticed a post in the forums from one of our FTMF participants worth mentioning, because it’s a great example of the Law of Polarity in action.   She writes:

My husband overlooked a tax [that was] supposed to be paid for [on] an income of about 20K. Having learned the law of polarity, I thought there must be something good in this. Indeed, it turned out to be a blessing in disguise even if we had to hire an accountant to sort it out and pay him about 1K. Instead of having to pay for probably between 5K-7K in taxes, the taxman gave us back about 10K. It’s amazing how things have worked out! Now, each time something so bad happens, I always expect a great blessing.

My husband noticed her story and here was his response:

Thank you for the great example of the law of polarity in action. As you know, “To think truth in spite of appearances” is the hardest work in the world. You did exactly that, when you refused to believe that the circumstance was ‘bad’.

To everyone else: From the stickman, remember that this was just data coming in- not good or bad until Cessy assigned meaning to it. She rejected thoughts of lack, loss, and negativity, and chose to assign good meaning to this apparently negative data. I would venture to suppose that she didn’t apply any feelings of anxiety over the situation, but instead, got excited about the good that was invariably on its way – not in spite of, but because of her chosen reaction.

Good work!

Join us in the forums to share your story, and to read many, many others!  Be inspired and encouraged on this journey – meet thousands of others in our community who all want to learn to live by the principles and enjoy the abundant life that it promises!

Need some help spotting a “rabbit”?

Be sure to sign up for the “Leslie Recommends…” newsletter.  When I spot a potentially profitable “rabbit”, I’ll let you know!  Then you can check it against your gut instinct to see if it’s the right next path for you.. or not.

These opportunities come through my friends or associates, and while I may believe in what they have to offer, it will be up to you to determine if it’s a good match for you.

Sign up using the form below:

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(You may be required to CONFIRM YOUR REQUEST if you’re not already in my database – it will come from my address at “thoughtsalive.com”.)

To your success!

Leslie

PS. You’ll also receive the occasional ThoughtsAlive Ezine with counter-intuitive tips and tricks for thriving in today’s economy, but remember, it’s easy to cancel anytime. You can even cancel the “ThoughtsAlive Ezine” without affecting your subscription to the “Leslie Recommends…” newsletter, and vice versa.

Trevan and I have been learning a LOT from a couple of guys named Rich and Ron and I know you’re going to love them. They’re teaching us specific principles applicable to what they call “bootstrapping” a business, and it’s made a huge impact on our success already.

I’m telling you, mindset is everything! And these guys know “mindset” for successful business. They’ve built nearly 30 businesses from next to nothing… and have had some failures and some amazing successes – and we get to learn from their experiences in the trenches!

What is Bootstrapping? One way to describe it might be: building a really profitable business, starting with very little money.

When you register, you’ll be provided with the information on how to access the recording. (Because this teleseminar event  already took place.)

You’ll learn:

1) WHAT is the bootstrap mindset?

2) HOW does an entrepreneurial candidate discover if he/she has what it takes to bootstrap?

3) WHY is embracing failure so important to the “bootstrap” mindset of entrepreneurship?

4) WHY is idea creation so important to “bootstrapping” and HOW can it be accelerated?

5) There are certain tools you use to filter or prove your business ideas. What are the tools? How do they work? Why do you use these particular tools?

6) WHY is the Zig Zag principle so important to boostrapping success and HOW does it work?

7) WHAT does “climb high, sleep low” mean and WHY is it critically important to living in balance?

8 ) What does “crossing the line of balance” mean?

Bootstrapping is for:

• Those working in the corporate world who want a venture on the side
• Those who want an exit from the corporate world by growing a business
• Those in a position to bring a few thousand dollars to their dreams
• Those who already run their own business, who need help achieving their potential
• The working class who desire to break the cycle of living paycheck to paycheck
• Those who have the entrepreneurial bug and need structure and direction

Fill out this form to be sent the REPLAY of this teleclass which took place on Thursday 2/18/2010.  (Keep in mind that you may hear mention of gifts or promotions that have since expired.)

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More about “Bootstrapping”:

The Principles Taught Are Applicable to All

Any determined individual can employ the principles presented in “Bootstrap Business” and find success. The concepts are not specific to any one type of business and can be applied to small, private businesses or to technology-driven startups. The information is full of solid principles to help you create honest, long-lasting value, whatever your field may be.

Novice Bootstrappers Will Save Millions of Dollars

The wisdom and practicality of this information will help beginning business owners navigate the big issues: taxes, partnership agreements, scaling, and hiring, to name a few. There is no simple checklist to follow for making money or how to avoid losing money. Instead, a certain mindset and philosophy are required in order to make informed decisions. “Bootstrap Business” provides insight into that mindset as well as actionable guidance one needs to follow to avoid the big mistakes while developing a winning posture.

Business Owners Will Learn Principles and Practices They May Be Missing

There are huge numbers of existing small business owners who will greatly benefit from “Bootstrap Business”. This information was initially developed for startup entrepreneurs but have found that small business owners are the most vocal audience requesting this information. Many of the potholes small business owners must navigate on a daily basis are addressed. Issues such as how to scale a business, how to compete with larger companies, and how to manage cash flow are at the heart of their message.

Seasoned Entrepreneurs Will Nod in Agreement

Experienced entrepreneurs will embrace this information because it helps them better communicate the fundamental concepts they have experienced. It will provide them a structure and framework with which to build their future endeavors.

See you there!

Do you ever feel overloaded with too many options, too much information, too many people telling you what to do to succeed?

You’re not alone. Here’s an email I received, and my reply on the matter.

Linda said:

I don’t know if you will actually answer this, but I am getting frustrated because I am getting INUNDATED with various “I have the secret YOU need to be successful in life” emails / offers / programs / gimmes!

I certainly can’t do them all simultaneously, and while they may all be worthwhile, it seems to me there is a lot of redundancy. I am STILL trying to work my way through your FTMF materials, and I don’t know that I need to get something ELSE while I still have not finished what I HAVE!

…I feel like I am spinning my wheels with a “Lo here” and a “Lo there” … like the poor guy trying to catch the rabbit in the same way the fox / wolf / whatever did! Any words of wisdom you could share would be appreciated. Thanks! Linda

My response to Linda (with a few more little notes):

Breathe, Linda, breathe.

There’s a lot of noise out there, and you can trust that the RIGHT next step will be there when you’re ready for IT. Just because it’s good, it doesn’t mean you have to jump on it immediately. It will be there again when you’re ready for it, if it really is the right thing for you to do.

I don’t open all my soliciting emails. I only open them if I’m currently seeking an answer to a burning question, and only if the email that shows up seems like it might have the answer to THAT question.

I get overloaded if I look at all of them. Sometimes I have to say, “I just don’t have the mental bandwidth to wrap my brain around ANYthing else right now” – and then I go forward – at peace taking things at my own pace, knowing that I do not have to run faster than I have mental, emotional, or physical strength.

When the student is ready, the teacher appears. If too many teachers appear, get clear on your overall objective. Once that is back in focus, the right ones will be obvious – you’ll know it in your gut – and the wrong ones in that moment will no longer have a magnetic pull on you.